Memzie at Hogwarts
by MemzieLover4Eva
Summary: <html><head></head>Read and experience the thrilling journey that is the love of Emma and McKenzie as Scarlet tries to bring a couple so badly matched together in perfect whoremany.</html>
1. Chapter 1

It was just a normal start of year at Hogwarts. Students were eating and celebrating the fact that they could escape their parents, or evil goblin guardians, for a whole year! No more abuse of their eardrums and such about their messy, messy rooms and dirty, good for one thing friends. This freedom they achieved every year meant the students could get up to all sorts of mischief without being caught, all because Sev and Minny preffered sucking sherbet lemons to spanking the childrenn for their wrongdoings, this was especially so since Dumbledore started joining in now and then with his army.

They had to thank The Chosen One for that.

Mid-sausage, Scarlet peaked over the top of the Slytherin table, fulled to the brim of delicious goodies, and stared as the procession of fresh meat the teachers liked to call first years entered the Great Hall. They were being led by Minny as usual.

She retreated below and caught sight of some spankable asses, which was all she could see from her position under the bench. She finnished her meal and pulled herself level with with Bernard the Bangable.

"Thanks for feeding me." She said with a grin, earning one of Bern's winkis. But as she saw this gesture, she noticed a slab of meat walking up to the Sorting Hat. This lambchop was raven-haired and was clearly a mudblood (AN: sorry I meant muggle, but Draco is with me and has a lot of influence over my body, especially my tongue), one could tell she was a mudgle because she had glasses, any pur or halfblood would have gone to the Woptician's by now (AN:that's the Wizards and Witches Optician's). Either way, The Sorting Hat enjoyed his interaction with this steak, you could tell because he was bobbing up and down, and pronounced her Hufflepuff because of how kind and hard-woring she clearly was, the old hag!

She scampered away to join her house, blowing kisses, annd was welcomed by many hands stroking her body. She sighed with pleasure and Scarlet turned her head away in disgust of how sexually active Hufflepuffs were.

Up next to the stage was a toothpick called McKenzie, she had to be kicked on to the stage by Minny she was sooooo scared of the pedo-hat. But as she placed the hat on her noggin, Scarlet noticed her eyes skirt the Hufflepoof table until they found their target, the raven-haired Ravenclaw girl who was currently being plastered with chocolate. SHe was placed in Slytherin and as she was hobbling towards her table, Scarlet heard a lightbulb flicker with an idea.

"Oy, Bern," she whispered sweetly in the young boys ear,"Did you catch the Hufflepuffs girl's name?"

"The fit mudblood who the hat banged? Yeah, her name was McKenzie."

"No! That's the other one you stoned twat!" In a huff, Scarlet pointed her wand at her head and sent a telepathic message to Anna, who was playing the bagpipes, on the Gryffindoor table. Anna caught the message and played a tune indicating she had no idea. In the end, after messaging various gang-bang-buddies, she massaged Geargis. Georgia was in Ravenclaw, and right at that moment she was noting down each first year and rating their tight bods. Scarlet knew she would know who the Ravenclaw girl was, but then Georgia would know Scarlet had an interest in her. However, Scarlet needed to know so she could sleep tonight.

"Do you know who the Raven-haired, white-rooted, mudgle Hufflepeuff was?" She asked wearily.

"Yea, man." Georgia replied.

"Would you care to share?"

"What's in it for me?" Typical Georgia, the saleswitch of Hogwarts.

"Two weeks with Bernard the Bangable."

"And?"

"And my debt. Now just tell me the freakin' name!"

"Emma. Not title...yet." Georgia gave a sweet smile.

With the two names known two her, Scarlet pronounced her new dedication, Project Memzie.


	2. Chapter 2

Scarlet had been stalking McKenzie throughout the school. The eejit was being a pain in the ass to find though because she was so midget. Finally, she was found sitting alone beneath The Humping Pillow. Scarlet let out a cackle (AN: because she's a witch.) of laughter because the usually horny tree seemed to be turned away from the sac of bones nestled in the crevaces of its roots. Scarlet, despite her mirth, sympathised with the first year. Hufflepuffs could naturally find things, e.g. pleasure points, natural aphrodisiacs that Pomona grew in her greenhouse, etc; Gryffindooors didn't take no for an answer, that's how Anna got her bagpipes (wink, wink); and Ravenclwas had entire group mind fuck sessions in their common room, using a series of spells that only a few knew.

_Scarlet remembered a time when she had been the girl sat in the wHomping Pillaws roots, it was only when Georgia had taken her to a mindfuvk sesh that she realized what love was, not trusting Ravenclwas. She had spent he next two weeks in the mental ward wishing she had never been naughty, but while there, a skimpily clad nurse called Madam put on her rubbers and poked Scarlet with something pointy, what came out the end of it was white, viscous, and gave off smoke. After having enduring Maddam's wandwork, she had felt sane again_.

_"What happened?" she had asked Madam._

_"The Ravenclaws brought you here after using your mind for erotic stimulation. You are part of the unlucky 2 percent of witches that is affect by the spell they used and you came down with a bout of Tiger's Strippers which can only be cured with Dementor cum. Sadly, since Dolores broke up with Rolf we've had a shortage. Oh and by the way, you'll be shitting black vapour for the next two weeks."_

_"Will the Dementor sperms fertilise my eggs?" she remembered having asked naively._

_"Maybe. But if you think happy thoughts then there is only eighty percent chance of successful impregnation." Madam had walked away and Scarlet had promised to be happier from then on._

But McKenzie wasn't happy. Her head raised as Scarlet approached. But Scarlet's presence awakened the tree and it went straight fror her. She rolled to the side avoiding it seductive branches, _not now_ she said to herself. "Rub its knob!" she shouted at McKenzie who was cowering near the roots still. But McKenzie stayed there, tuthpick-like. The tree grabbed Scarlet's legs and pulled them apart, after all her years at Hogwarts this didn't hurt as she was very flexible, and pulled her closer to a large protruding piece of bark. "RUB THE KNOBBY BIT ON ITS ROOT!" she cried. McKenzie moved and started jerking the tree off.

The Humpong Pilow let her go then.

"You're McKenzie, right?" she asked sweetly, scurrying out of range.

"Yes." The girl answered shyly.

"Well I'm Scarlet the Scandalous and I'd like to help you with your problem."

"What problem?"

"The fact that you have the hots for a Hufflepuff by the name of Emma yet can't even get laid by a by a horny old piece of enchanted wood."

"I don't like her! I mean, what the hell is a Hufflepuff?!" she was getting annoyed now and was starting to look like a little rat.

"yeah, of course you don't like her. Look, if you want to spend the rest of your life in isolation, thta's fine by me, but i'm only here to help." Scarlet walked away but shouted back: "Oh yeah. Just a small tip. Inter-house animosity was invented by The Chosen One to make his sexual escapades with a certain slytherin, *cough*Draco*cough*, more thrilling. Wink."

And she swaggered away.

McKenzie had a dream that night. Emma arrived at her dorm crying with emotion after reading McKenzie's poetry. McKenzie brought her further into the room and closed the door. They sat down on McKenzie's bed and comforted eachother with tender trails of sweaty palms and cold fingertips.

"I didn-How long have you felt this way?" Emma said, all four eyes looking at McKenzie's two.

"Since I followed you to your house and saw you undress. You were outgorgeous. But then Lucifer arrived with fresh orange juice and threatened me with a crisp packet. I knew then thta I had to wait my turn. And here you are." she smiled so brightly, she looked like a creepy-ass china doll.

"Oh, Z! I remember that day! I was such a horrible slut back then. I watched Lucifer beat you up and got off on it. Will you ever forgive me?" she pleaded.

"Only if you swear to never leave me."

Emma brought the other girl's hand to her chest, just above her low-cut top, "In my heart of hearts, My Eldunari, I propose on Voldemort's nipple, that was given to me by my Uncle Ron, to never leave you."

"Now we suck eahcother's blood, to seal the promise, and bind you to me." Emma was too horny tho and jumped McKenzie without sealing the vow. They made out and ran their hands up and down the others body. This was pleasurable until Emma started eating McKenzie. Legit feeding off of her. McKenzie screamed but Emma didn't stop.

Finally, McKenzie Woke up from the nightmare to encounter a strange figure watching her sleep.


	3. Chapter 3

McKenzie sat up immediately. Covering her moobs with the duvet.

"Eeeeek!" She whisper-squealed, whimpering. THe stranger came forward into the ligh of the moon. It was Manjot! THe Gryffindick from the North towel. mcKenzie retreated further into the bedsheets, sitll quivering and mooaning. The girl from the rowdy house spoke.

"Hi, I know your new but I was wondering if you've seen my burgundy wand," she came and sat next to McKenzie, leaning into her, "It's 11 inches (wink, wink, nudge, nudge), encrusted with a leaf-type pattern, and with a Beavcoon String core. Also, slothough it;s redwood, it's burgundy in colour." SHe smiled evilly and rubbed her hand over what she thought was McKenzie's knee.

"That's not my knee." Mckenzie said shiftily, fidgeting.

"Oh," said an unfazed Manjot. "Well, I guess i'll be seeing you around, McKnob. But if you do see this burgundy wanc, please tell me, because my magic stick means a lot to me. And if my sources find that you have got it, you will pay in more ways than one."

And she waddled away, like the ducks she was terrified of (AN: she hav anatidaephobia, okay.), 'til the weary next day. Turning around at the door and performing some odd jerking actions, screech-singing, "Don't cross the squad." a song by the Weird Sisters tribute band.

"Dafuq was that?" Penelope and Fancy, Mckenzie's roomates, said in tune with eachother. THey then started laughing and gigling about what just happened. Ignoring McKenzie completely, who just fell asleep after the ordeal.

"Honestly, we've only been here a while and already she's got 'em begging." *giggles* (AN: i don't matter who said what as they are cold, shiny, hard plastics who are exactly the same as one another.)

"Ikr. Like I don't even... whatever, do you think she's selling crack? And like...getting popularity via Charlie?" *faked curiosity*

"Maybe, she is so weird. Let me tell you a secret. We used to be best friends at Purebloods Middle school." *cringing*

"Wait, what?" *shockes gasp* *faked expression*

"I know it's totally embarrassing... but whatever. So when I got my first wand, Beech, he was totally gorgeaus but then he had to move to Indiana, she was all like 'Why didn't you spell me later?'. Then my bfday came up, which was an all broomstick poll party, and I didn't invite her because I thought she was just a broom. I mean... there would be broomsticks in their bathing suits! She was just a broom! So her Mum called my Mom and it was just really weird, then at the start of this year she returned as stupid muggle fuking preppy bitch, and now I guess she sells crack." *face like 'meh, who cares'*

"Wow. I wanna tweet this, but first... Lemme take a selfie." *gets out phone*

"What is 'selfie'?"*being an ass because she bin livin under rock*

"Oh it's like fetch, from the muggle world." *Exactly as Gretchen Weiners says it* (AN: if u dont kno hoo that is the prep and can fuk of!)

"Okay, lets take a selfie." *All smiles of evilness*.

McKenzie's subconscious heard this and so made her have a dream about "those bitches", except they were only the voices and words of those harpies, their bodies were those of Sad and Dead Winchester.

===Time skip cuz YOLO===

_Up in the mornin', out on the job,_

_walkin out to brighten up your day_

Carlota's radio went off. Then she remembered why she set an alarm. Project Memzie!

Scarlet the Scandalous was utterly thrilled that today, she was certaain, her ship would become canon. It was the first Quidditch match of the season, Gryffindor vs. Huffelpuff, and therefore a perfect time to push memzie torgether. Quidditch matches were popular because they provided a situation where rowdy, hormonal teenagers could shout and act as they wished without being caught because they are in a crowd. And if you don't like seeing people riding brooms, quaffles entering rings of various sizes or bats making contact with bludgers, you can always piss off somewhere else and be guarateed silence as the house shool, mainly, participates in Quidditch.

Scarlet walked out of the common room, passing Geniva and Chantel, who were having a passionate staring compotition, and entered the Great hall. Confidently she strode up to the Hufflepuff table and sat down on the table, waiting for her client to arrive. Fran came in the end and sat on Scarlets lap, greeting her with a big smooch, costumary of Hufflpuffs.

"Do you have it?" Scarlet whispered huskily, gently nibbling Frna's earlobe.

"Yes!" she moaned in response. They switched vials of hair shreddings and Scarlet stood up, knocking Fran off her lap, and walked over to her next client. Fran quickly got off the floor and dusted herself off, rushing to catch Scarlet up. She caught up just in time to see Scarlet handing a large pouch of Galleons to Geargia from Ravenclwed. Scarlet span round and locked eyes with Fran. _Girl's Bathroom, now. _Her eyebrows seemed to say_. Dang, she has nice eyebrows, _thought Fran.

They met by the entrance to the Chamber of Secrets. Some say this spot is where to go if you want to pop your pumpkin, others say it is simply where to go if you want to frickle frackle until you die, hence Moaning Myrtle. But Scarlet found this bathroom tacky, therfore only used it for underhand business. She gestured to Fran, and brought out two vials of polyjuice potion. TTHe girls emptied the hair shreddings into the vials and downed them in one. Scarlet kept the sunshine coloured liquid down her throat, whilst Fran ended up coughing and spluttering because this was her first time. Soon they morphed into each other.

"ARe we good wwith the plan?" The original Scarlet asked.

"Yes. i convince McKenzie to come with me to the Shrieking Shack to show her what it's for, whilst you use my body and my positin as Emma's best friend to drag her from the Qudditch match as backup to my "date" that is also at the Shrieking Shack."

"ANd then?" Scarlet asked, knowing full well it's better to have a detailed plan.

"I say I'm going to get changed into something more apporpriate and go downstairs where you will appear with Emma, we then tell Emma to go upstairs so we can have time alone, but instead we ditch them and blocke the way back."

"Perfect! Now you'are clear on what to do after we block the tunnel?"

"Uh-huh. I can do what I like until sunset when the potion wears off. At which point we meet back at this bathroom and discuss what we did today so as to not arouse suspition."

"Great! now go do some persausiop!" Scarlet was the one to initiate the kiss this time, lingering for just a feww seconds, before leaving the starstruuck Hufflepuff alone in the toilet.

"I guess i'll be seeing you two later then." winked Moaning Myrtle who had been listening to their scheming.

Fran just smiled. This was the kind of career breakthrough she needed. TIME TO RUIN PEOPLE'S LIVES!


End file.
